Tag Archives: life

“Sandy” As Cheap Entertainment

I think most people from time to time wish they could lock themselves in the house and never have to deal with other people again. I’d like to think that would make me feel better and lower my stress level considerably. We all know that is not very realistic. We still have to make money to buy the necessities in life and to pay for that roof and four walls we’ve surrounded ourselves with. Besides, I don’t think it would take very long before those walls started to close in on me and cabin fever would set in. My stress level would probably double at that point and totally defeat the purpose.

Normally, I tend to think this way when someone or just general circumstances in life become hard to deal with. I have recently found myself feeling just the opposite. Lately, I have had a “difficult person” in my life but instead of wanting to just stay away, I find myself wanting to be around more and more. It has become a form of entertainment for me.

This person, we’ll call them…oh, I don’t know…. “Sandy”….like the squirrel from the Sponge Bob Squarepants cartoon, because that is what happens to be on my son’s television at the moment.

Like the cartoon Sandy, this one is actually very intelligent and capable of doing what needs to be done and figuring out how to deal with more than your average day to day problems. The thing is, this Sandy loves to manipulate people, lie when it isn’t necessary and keep drama rolling at all times. All Sandy’s energy and brain power is devoted to these things rather than just simply taking care of the everyday tasks and solving normal daily problems. I’m sure it’s all very exhausting.

I’ve learned that there are very simple rules in dealing with people like Sandy. First you have to keep your nose clean and make sure you are doing what you are supposed to be doing. Cross all your  T’s and dot all your I’s and by all means, re-check yourself often. Second, watch your back every second of the day. Never just assume that everything will be okay because people like Sandy can strike when you least expect it. Finally, the third rule is to be sure to give them plenty of rope with which to hang themselves. Then sit back and watch the show. All this checking and re-checking and watching your own back, does take a little extra energy, but it is necessary and the payoff is usually worth it all.

The Sandy’s of the world are a very interesting breed to observe. They seem completely oblivious to the tangled mess they make of their own lives in the process of deliberately trying to hurt someone else. They usually believe that they are winning the “game” until the very second before their whole charade is finally exposed.

If you happen to be the target of their deceit, take it as a compliment because they only attack people that they see as a threat in some way. Maybe they think you are smarter or more capable of something that they want for themselves. Maybe they envy you in some way. Sometimes they just want to get rid of anyone intelligent enough to see through their lies.

So, instead of Sandy making me want to turn into a complete hermit, she has accomplished just the opposite. I am beginning to very much enjoy the show. Who doesn’t like seeing justice served?

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If It Ain’t King James…

So, there’s bridge construction going on a few miles from my house and on my regular lunchtime commute home today, I found myself stuck. If it weren’t bad enough that they are taking out two bridges at once less than a mile apart, as I waited I found myself staring into what I would wish to be the great abyss, but turned out to be a odd little bumper sticker on the back of the van in front of me.  The sticker read, “If  it ain’t King James, it ain’t Bible.”

I have more than one problem with this. Actually the first thing that came to mind was, “Welcome to the Bible Belt, AIN’T it swell!?!??!” Is nothing sacred? Come on people! I am very passionate about my cheesecake but I don’t have pro-cheesecake slogans on the back of my car and you’ll certainly never find me downing the strawberry cheesecake as opposed to the cherry cheesecake!

Also, doesn’t the whole point surrounding this have to do with language? Yes, we are in the south but that doesn’t mean we should go completely slack on the vocabulary. If you are going to speak out, do it with dignity…or maybe the idea was to target rednecks…

Now to the King James Controversy. Yes, I understand that the King James version was translated from Hebrew, Greek and other languages by tons of scholars in an attempt to keep it as accurate as possible….but I would like to believe that the other versions of the Bible were translated to a more modern version of English by scholars as well.  I feel that the use of the King James version is nothing more than tradition and there’s nothing wrong with that. So, please stop feeding people the lines about God specifically leading the translators of the original texts to translate them perfectly. If he could lead those guys, he could lead the guy who translated “The Message.”

I have no problem with what Bible you prefer to read or even if you prefer not to read one at all….I just found it annoying that while stuck in traffic, I had to translate redneck slang to understand that you like your religion translated the early modern English way.


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